I was feeling so confident and happy after my 14 week appointment, then as time ticked by anxiety set in. I haven't felt a single flutter in many days...I know this is normal, but it still makes me worry. I have also lost 5 pounds which seems really odd now that I'm this far along. To top off my freakout I had a horrible nightmare that my baby died. Yesterday I reached my breaking point and decided to call my OB with a little nudge from a friend of mine. She helped me realize that that's what my doctor is for and he shouldn't have a problem with helping to calm my nerves. I also feel like being anxious is the wrong environment for a growing baby so I made the call!
I AM SO GLAD I DID!! The receptionist was extremely understanding and offered to have my doctor call me as soon as he could. He did just a hour or so later...from his cell phone...and was so welcoming and sensitive. He said, "Ohh...I don't want you upset!! Why don't you come in tomorrow morning and we'll take a little look! Okay?" I was so happy to have his support and not feel blown off the way I have so many times in the past by my RE.
So this morning I showed up 15 minutes early and expected a long wait since I didn't have an appointment and was being "sqeezed" in. They called me back in less than 5 minutes. I was so surprised!! Then the nurse who took me back to the room was so friendly and compassionate. She told me how she felt the same way with her first baby and that I shouldn't feel foolish at all for coming in for a "mind calming" visit. Then she told me that the doc was going to do an ultrasound so I could see the baby with my own eyes! I was stunned! I was sure he would only use a doppler for a few seconds just to prove to me that there was still a heartbeat and then send me on my way. Nope, he was going all out for this paranoid mama!!! How nice is that!?!?!?!
He instantly located the heartbeat and I literally felt a huge weight lifted off my worried mind as I took a big sigh of relief. I'm not sure how I got so worked up with worry that there was something wrong with my baby, but seeing that little heart pump was the best feeling EVER. Since I start week 17 tomorrow he told me that he would be able to tell me the gender for sure by now. Since Ben wasn't with me I told him that I wanted to know, but not until my husband could find out at the same time. Dr. F suggested that since he was recording the sonogram on DVD (yes, he doubled checked that this time it was actually working) that he write "boy" or "girl" on the screen while I look away and then Ben and I could watch the DVD together later. I loved the idea and told him to go for it! It turns out that the umbilical cord was running right between Baby's legs, so once again he couldn't determine the sex no matter how hard he tried. This baby really doesn't want us to know it's secret!! Ha!! Oh well...we have our anatomy scan in 3.5 weeks so hopefully then we will finally learn if we are having a son or a daughter. Dr. F did get a shot of my baby sucking its thumb though! This picture totally melts my heart!!!
Boy or girl...it doesn't matter! Our baby is healthy and that is all we want!! He told me that the HB was 166bpm and that Baby was meauring 4.5 inches from head to it's little bottom (that doesn't count the legs.) So we have a perfectly healthy babe. My doc used these exact words, "Everything looks awesome!" Ahhh....sweet relief!!
I also ordered a fetal doppler yesterday from Ama.zon. I figured that if I could listen to the HB at home whenever I want then I will probably not freak out as easily anymore. Based on the reviews the doppler got, it seems like it will work great. I'll update when it arrives!
Ps. I nominated some of my bloggy friends for an award yesterday (I wish I could have nominated so many more of you wonderful ladies) so if you missed that post please be sure to go check it out!! Love you guys!! XOX
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Isn't it kind of worth the hours of terror when you thought something was wrong to then have the opportunity to see your little baby? I know how scared you must have felt and it's a terrifying feeling, but then you got to see him/her! And sucking the thumb! OH! I love it!!! This is really getting excited. There are BABIES in our bellies, girl!! And yours is super healthy and will stay that way. (That said, I would have reacted the same way you did when you went without movement...but you know me =)
ReplyDeleteXOXO
I'm so glad you called the OB! And that they were so wonderful! AND, that you got a u/s!!! Baby is beautiful! My hunch is still GIRL, but I'm hoping you get a good shot of the goods soon!
ReplyDeleteEeek! I'm just so excited for you...scrolling down to catch up on the rest of the new posts now! :-)
Oh and I'm so glad that you have a doppler on the way! I love having ours. The funny thing, though, is that I find that I use it much less than I thought I would...but, knowing that I could use it is such a relief!
ReplyDeleteI hope it's the same for you! That said, I'm feeling overdue on hearing Beaker's hb, so I think tonight's the night! I read that he/she should be the size of a softball next week, so surely it'll be easier to find the heartbeat than it was a few weeks ago when he was just a couple inches! Back then, only Andy could actually ever end up finding it! A Daddy's girl or boy already !:-)
Congrats on the pregnancy!
ReplyDeleteWonderful doctor you have there. A keeper to be sure. And even better news that all is going along beautifully.
Best wishes!
so cool. love it!!
ReplyDeleteYour doctor sounds amazing. I think the doppler is really going to help with your anxiety!!! Your little guy/girl looks so cute sucking it's little thumb!!! I can't wait till mine have thumbs!
ReplyDeleteWOnderful u/s pic!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad your doctor is that amazing and just made you feel more calm. Glad to see a perfect baby and I know the relief of making sure everything is okay. I felt that way at week 13 when I had brown spotting and cried my eyes out in full panic mode. I'm just so glad everything was perfect and amazing. :-)
ReplyDeleteHello! It sounds like you have a wonderful dr. I wish all drs were as compassionate!! I am so glad that they were able to have you come in for an u/s and you were able to see your perfect little one! What a cool u/s picture too!!
ReplyDeleteI L-O-V-E the ultrasound pic. That is one of the cutest pics I've ever seen.
ReplyDeleteAnd I love my doppler, we use it every night before bed so I can roll over and sleep knowing that my baby is alive and well. I hope you enjoy yours!
How nice of your doctor to show you so much care! Hopefully your little monkey will cooperate and the anatomy visit! ICLW
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh, I didn't realize you were so worried, Cilla! You did the right thing by calling the OB -- whatever eases your mind is the best thing to do. I think getting the doppler sounds like a good idea. You will feel so much better being able to check on your little one whenever you feel concerned.
ReplyDeleteAnd speaking of your little one -- how CUTE is that u/s pic!! Awww so precious ... I love the ones with their little hands in the picture. =) So glad to hear all is well.
P.S. Thanks so much for the award!! I will post it soon!!
Those panicky moments are totally normal and you did the right thing calling. Having a doppler was a godsend and a sanity saver while I was pregnant post IF.
ReplyDelete~ICLW
What a great doctor you have!
ReplyDeleteWe didn't find out the sex at all. It was the best gift of all after all of our IF struggles!
ICLW
I'm so glad you followed your heart and got your piece of mind - that gorgeous pic alone was worth it!!!
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to hearing the sex soon!
xoxo
how cute is that ultrasound picture?! Glad you have such an awesome doctor!
ReplyDelete*ICLW
That picture is so sweet! Glad you called your doctor & he was so wonderful and understanding...what a relief!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you called your OB for some peace of mind and that they were understanding!
ReplyDeleteGreat news that all is well!
ICLW
I am so behind on commenting this week!!! I am glad you called and your doctor sounds fantastic. He seems so much better than the RE. I am glad you are having a better experience with him. The thumb in his/her mouth is the sweetest!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the award! I am going to have to get busy with that. Take care!!!!